EnJOYOGA ~

At the turn of the calendar year, I made a couple of promises to meself for 2017. Not one to make "New Year's Resolutions", I prefer to envision doing some things I've not yet done. Like go to The Grand Canyon. And..YOGA.

I have a sister who happens to teach Yoga at the local YMCA, and she's been kind enough to have me over (to her home) for a lesson. It was an hour long, and it was a large challenge for me. Mostly because of the way my body is currently demanding my attention. I don't need to lose weight (don't judge me!) and I have no desire to sculpt my physique as I once did. My Gym Rat days are over. I bid them farewell a decade ago, but not without a fuss. It wasn't really a choice so much as it was about me heeding my body's message:

TIME. FOR. CHANGE.

And so, after her private class I decided I needed to find something a bit more gentle. Not that she was forcing me to do poses I couldn't. Quite the opposite. She repeatedly reminded me to "ask" and then listen to what my body would agree to. It was both beautiful and frustrating. I never forgot the feelings, though, after it was over. I felt so energized. I felt energy actually moving through me. I felt a profound sense of gratitude. I knew that I needed to do more of this. I also knew it was about finding the proper regimen for my particular set of circumstances.

So, I went to a class at our local library. It was NOT to my liking. For so many reasons. For the sake of brevity (here), suffice to say that the instructor and the energy in that room were not what I was looking for. I left the class with even more determination.

I will find the right-for-me teacher.

I had already done some major perusing on YouTube. You can find videos on anything there. And so I did. I found this woman, who goes only by "Candace", who struck a chord. She has a vast collection of videos on many types of Yoga, from the beginner to the highly-practiced. I was looking for something that would allow me to actually do the entire regimen without feeling like I'd failed. I wanted gentle movements, not ones that would pain me to try. I also knew the voice of the instructor mattered. It's a thing for me. I'm a singer by nature, so voices do matter. A LOT. When I heard Candace's voice in that first video, I knew I'd found the one.

BINGO! is what I heard.

Now, a little more than a week later, I cannot even begin to tell you how happy I am to have found her. I'm listening to her wise guidance (about pain) and her gentle way of working through the routines. I'm excited to do them. I feel fantastic! And...it's definitely changing the way I move throughout my day. In all, it's MAGICK! So, I thought I'd share her YouTube channel with you. Just in case you have the urge to do something you've never done. OR to do something a little differently. OR...just because.

Regardless of your current situation or physical circumstance, I do believe she's worth a few moments of your time. If it's not your thang, you might like to share with your own friends/loved ones if they're looking for some inspiration. Either way, I thought it worth the time to tell you.

As always, Joy is a CHOICE.
So is Yoga.

Cheers!

Yoga by Candace

no. you cannot change "them"

I don't give much credence to astrological forecasts. You know...those "daily" thingies you get on your homepage or the little blurb in the newspapers. Mostly I think they're kinda hokey. Just too generic to mean anything. But then, what do I know? I mean, it's not like I've ever studied such things.

On the other hand, I did have my chart done once. I had this friend who was really into it. Apparently, she was very curious about "why" I was the way I was. I thought it was pretty funny; that she was so adamant about the "why" part. So I gave her the data she needed and waited for her findings. A week later, she phoned, all excited, and asked me to come over for a glass of wine. Off I went to see what the stars had to say.

Turns out that little chart was quite the eye-opener. There were all kinds of things that led me to a better understanding of my personality traits and some of the more obvious leanings I had when dealing with the world. It was kinda cool. Still, I didn't go any further with it. I didn't buy books or do any research (as is my usual M.O.) because...well, frankly, I didn't really give a rip. I had that attitude of "I am who I am." and didn't give it much thought thereafter.

I won't say that I haven't been curious though. I think it's pretty wild that all kinds of "heads of state", etc., hire professional astrologers to tell them what's cookin'. I've always found that surprising. That, in itself, was what got me more curious. But, again, didn't do much about it.

But then something happened that made me remember my curiosity. It was a little spat I had with a friend. She got all upset with me because I'd actually taken action on a suggestion that she made. Turns out, she wasn't really wanting me to do what I did. And she got all pissed at me even though it had been her idea. I realized this as I listened to what she wasn't saying. She was pretty twisted and I could feel it. Even over the phone. I asked her what was wrong. She made all kinds of excuses but wouldn't tell me how she was really feeling. Finally I realized that there wasn't anything I could say or do to make her come clean. I knew what she was pissed about, but I also knew she wasn't going to cop to it. She was in one of her nasty moods where she wanted to be pissed; she wanted to fight and blame and not take responsibility. She simply wanted to feel the anger. And it wasn't really me at all. I knew all this instinctively; and after trying for a few long minutes, I finally told her that I saw no point in continuing the conversation. I told her that I could feel her anger and that I was pretty certain that she wasn't telling me the truth. I also told her that it was her choice to be pissed and stay that way if she wanted. And then I told her I loved her and hung up the phone.

A while later, after giving it much thought, I realized that there was really nothing I could do about how she felt. I realized that, in a much larger way, she really does look for things to be angry about. She wants to feel like crap so she can have a reason to get on-your-lips drunk. She has no desire to live the joy that she has only experienced in small doses throughout her life. It's her M.O. It's what makes her world go round.

Sad. But oh-so-true. I've known her for a very long time and it's been a pattern for as long as I've known her. We'll be sailing along, each of us making progress in our own growth cycles, and then...WHAMMO! She comes up with something to justify getting all nasty with me. Last time it happened was a few years back and I simply refused to dance. I told her it was her choice to make; I made mine and stopped calling. I just let her be and didn't make any attempts to patch things up, as it were. This made her furious. But, in the end, she came 'round and made all kinds of apologies for her behaviour. I am a person who believes wholeheartedly in forgiveness. So we "kissed and made up" and off we went onto the next chapter of our friendship.

Now, if it sounds like I'm trying to be the hero here, please know I am not. I have no desire to be the one in the "right". I don't really give a rip about who's right and who's wrong. What matters most to me is that we learn and grow and get better at being Who We Really Are. All the rest is just a bunch of hooey. We can go 'round blaming everybody and their grandmother for all the crap in our lives. OR we can step back and have a look in the mirror. Because the person staring back is the person responsible for all of it. Every single bit of the angst and anger and anything else that feels "less than" is created by "me". And the sooner we all get that part, the sooner we'll stop feeling that ickiness. I know. I've had my many epiphanies. And the one thing I know for sure is this:

I cannot change ANYONE. I cannot convince, cajole, brainwash, urge, shove, or man-handle anyone into a belief. The reason I know this is no one has ever been able to do it to me. There isn't a soul on the planet who can change my mind about anything I don't want to change. So...the point?

The only person I can change is ME. Sure, there are people who can inspire me to look at myself with different eyes and lend me a new perspective. But in the end, they can't make the changes. It must come from me. Knowing this makes moments like the one with my friend make a whole lot more sense (and it saves me from going cuckoo over something I have no control over). It takes the pressure off me to change her (or anyone else who happens to float into my world). I cannot. Nor do I have any desire. She must walk her path and live the life she's chosen, even if it's filled with stuff I consider icky. I am not her. She is not me. No one lives in my skin (and vice versa). Any attempt to change someone else will always result in the same outcome:

Utter failure.

So quit trying. Quit wasting your time and energy on changing anyone else. Use that same time/energy to work on YOU. In my experience, that is what will bring the most joy to YOUR world. But then...who the hell am I to tell YOU?

2010....WOWZA!

A brandy new year...and the start of a new decade. Funny how just one second can make all the difference, huh? I've always thought the whole New Year's Eve thing was kind of goofy. I mean..it's just one second. But somehow it seems to matter. To a whole lotta folks. It's the dawning of a new year, which must mean that all manner of new things can occur. And for some, it does.

On the other hand...why must we wait until this one second interval to make anything new? Why must we hold off until the start of a new year to make whatever changes we wish to make? Why do we not do this every single morning?

It seems to me that every morning we awaken is a new beginning. There is an adage:

"With every new day, a new story begins."

I LOVE that.

I keep posted on my bathroom mirror. Every morning, when I walk in there to brush my teeth...there it is. And it ALWAYS makes me smile. Because, for me, it's absolutely true. Every single day, a new story begins. And it's up to me to write that story. Starting with the moment I open my eyes...until I lay myself down to rest. And if I've managed to touch the life of even one person in the smallest way, I have lived a good story for that day.

I realize that there are many who find this sort of thing a bit...annoying. How in the world can anyone be so danged cheerful all the time? Is she on crack, or whut?

Nope. Not on crack. I just made the choice to be happy, regardless of what's going on. Regardless of bumps in the road (which are inevitable), regardless of financial distress or physical impairments or boneheaded fools. Regardless of whatever is going on, it's my choice to either be happy...or not. Even when things seems to be impossibly, ridiculously challenging. Even when somebody gets on my last nerve. Even when the pain is so intense it seems I won't be able to breath. No matter. I get to choose:

Will I let this make me miserable or will I breath my way through it, trusting that this, too, shall pass?

I offer this up, yet again, as this new year begins because I think it's essential to live one's convictions. I believe, with all my Being, that we are here to live joyous, exhilarating lives. I believe we ALL have tremendous, marvelous gifts that can change the world...one person at a time.

So whether you just let someone step ahead in line at the grocery store, or you open a door for someone about to walk in at the same moment, or you simply smile at a stranger...just cuz....you have NO IDEA how much of an impact that little gesture may have on a person's day. Don't underestimate this. It matters.

And so do YOU.

I wish you the most bountiful, healthy, prosperous, happy, incredibly splendid year of your life.

Really.

vascillation ~

there's nothing like a little perspective to get you off your butt, ya know? 'specially when you think you're having a less than stellar day...and then, you hear someone else talk about theirs. yep. makes ya really aware of what you have...and you can see it with grateful eyes. good stuff.

it's not always easy. i know. sometimes, regardless of how hard i try, there's that icky black cloud following me around, threatening to drop hailstones on my head. big hailstones...like the kind that'll dent your car. scary stuff. but the thing is, when i remember that the cloud is there cuz i formed it, i can unform it just as quickly. if i want to, that is. back to the whole 'turn the other way' thang. perspective. perspective. perspective.

yesterday, i had this feeling, all day long, that my friend was not having a very good day. just a feeling in my gut. so, after a while, i called to see how she was doing. the moment i heard her voice, i knew my instincts were right on. (as usual). i also knew that she was trying real hard to NOT tell her 'sad story'...cuz we practice that sorta thing all the time. but in the end, she did...and i was so glad for it. cuz, by the time we hung up, she was feeling better and so was i. funny how that works. more and more i see that one of the best things to do when my day is kinda icky is to call someone else and offer up some sunshine for their day. ya know, it works every time. listening to someone else's stuff takes your mind off your own stuff and pretty soon you're both whoopin' it up and laughing at how silly you're (both) being. that ick? well, it's just an illusion anyway. just like the black cloud.

it's the moments in between...the vascillation...that makes ya crazy if you let it. sheeesh! it's not like we don't have the 'tools' to change our perspectives, or our attitudes, or our moods in general. cuz we do! all of us do. question is, how often do we use them when we need them most? cuz the way i figure it, it's pretty easy to be happy when everything is honky-dorey. it's when the poop hits the pavement that we think it's hard to be happy. but if ya boil it all down to THIS MOMENT...and you look around for just a minute...you can always find something to make you smile. something to be grateful for. something to make your heart do a little dance. if only you'd take that moment, ya know?

i'm pretty sure that all this crapola is temporary. i'm also pretty sure that soon, VERY soon, it'll all be a distant memory...something for me to remember (or not!) as a time when i was asked to look inside and see just how much i have...and how much i CAN...and how many options abound for me to live the best life ever. tell ya the truth....i am SOOOOOOOOOO looking forward to that (distant memory)! for now, though, i'm just gonna keep laughing about it. cuz the only other option is to cry. and what good would that do?

HAAAAAAAAAAAA!