Leave it alone!

Don't you find it funny how people will scratch and fight and beg and scream and carry on like crazies in the name of "want", and then, when they actually get whatever it is they're wanting, all they can do is talk about all the ick that was before this happened? Don't you find that just a little bit nutso?

I do. I think it's about the craziest thing we can do to ourselves. Just go on and on about how it was and not pay a smidgen of appreciation for how it is. NOW. Not yesterday or last week or a month ago. RIGHT NOW. You asked and you got what you wanted. So why are ya still talking about that old shit?

This commentary comes on the heels of several major changes made by myself and a few other very wonderful people I know. My change was all about moving. Something I've wanted to do for well over a year. When I finally made it happen, I was over-the-top-thrilled. And I still am. It's only been two weeks, but I can tell ya, they have been two of the happiest weeks I've spent in a very long time. Am I talking about the why's and how's and the rest of the Ick that prompted the move? Absolutely NOT. I don't want to live any of that crap for even one more second. Which was my motivation to begin with. The moment I put that last box in my truck and drove away, I was D-O-N-E. With a grin on my mugg and a giant YEEEEEHAWWWWW!, I drove down the road and never looked back. The few people who have asked about "why" have been shut down lickety-split. The rest already knew why...and were cheering for me the whole way. Now...in this new place with all the splendid new energies...that other place seems a million miles away. Life is GRAND, doncha think?

And then there are the others I mentioned...those who were also wanting and wanting and then...grabbed what they wanted. Do you think they are talking about the "before"? Hell no! They are so focused on their triumphs that they, too, are completely oblivious to their prior "ick". Tossed that out the window as they slid seamlessly into their "new" spaces. Celebrations abound. And all those involved are doing the Happy Dance for having realized those dreams. Not a second is wasted on what "was". Not one single nano-second!

So I offer this up to you now: ask for what you want. Stay focused only on that; whatever it is. Stop fretting over the "how's" and "why's" and just keep the image of your dream in your mind. Let the Universe take care of the details. Your job is to identify your desire and then GET OUT OF THE WAY! Once you've met that desire, leave the rest behind. Just LEAVE IT ALONE! It is no longer a part of your Now. So why you wanna keep bringing it up?

See what I mean?

It's YOUR Life ....

I made this slideshow some time ago...and a friend recently reminded to watch it again. Go figure!

Crayola

When was the last time you broke out your crayons and colored? You know, like in a coloring book? Like how you did it when you were a kid? Do you remember? Did you color inside the lines? Did you make up your own stuff or use a pre-drawn book? Did you have the big box or the small box? Did it have a sharpener built right into the box?

Yea. I know. It's been a million years, huh?

Well then. Maybe you outta go git yerself a box of Crayolas and git to it! Why? Well, I'm so glad you asked.

I'm not one of those who "knows" how to paint or draw or sculpt or sketch. I'm working on it, but I've never been a "natural". I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I never took the time to learn. 'Course most artists I know never really "learned" either. Which is what makes them artists. But that's not the point. I really do love to make stuff. I'm good with wood and words. But the other mediums have mostly been too daunting. Don't ask me why. Don't have a clue. But sometimes when you have the courage to just try something new, all kinds of strange and wonderful things show up. For example: a while back I bought this book called "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain". In this book, the author (who is an actual artist and professor of art) gives her insights on using the other side of your brain to draw creativity from. Being the logical kinda gal I am, I thought it'd be cool to give it a go. And guess what? I'm pretty darned good at it! Imagine that!

Anywayz...I began working my way through this fabuloso book and then a friend of mine, who is a wonderful writer and a writing coach, sent me this cool email with a bunch of her own drawings that she left uncolored. She suggested we print them out and get to filling them in. She suggested crayons, water paints, colored pencils, or whatever else we might have on hand. The moment I read the missive I thought, "HOLY CRAP! I HAVEN'T COLORED IN EONS!" So I dashed down to the local Target and got me a big box of crayons. Came home and got busy. Before I knew it, 2 hours had passed and I was in a state of meditative bliss. No kidding. I had spent 2 whole hours without a single bothersome thought. Not a stitch of pain in my body. Not a hint of angst to be found. I had effectively brought myself into a place of deep, happy calm. All with a box of crayons and a bunch of drawings. I was stunned!

I went back and re-read what Jill had written. And, not surprisingly, she was correct on all counts. She had suggested that coloring would unleash all kinds of creativity. And put you in a place of playful childhood. And make you happy. And a whole bunch of other stuff too. Like I said: correct on all counts.

So I thought I'd offer a little nudge for ya here. I thought it might be fun to see just how many of you might actually do it. And, of course, I'd be over-the-top-thrilled if you'd let me know. If you want, you can even send me your finished goodies. I'll post them here for all the world to see (if you want). But that's not the important part. The important part is to get you to playin' again. Play. Play. PLAY! You might just surprise yourself too.

Go on. Get those crayons out and COLOR!

no. you cannot change "them"

I don't give much credence to astrological forecasts. You know...those "daily" thingies you get on your homepage or the little blurb in the newspapers. Mostly I think they're kinda hokey. Just too generic to mean anything. But then, what do I know? I mean, it's not like I've ever studied such things.

On the other hand, I did have my chart done once. I had this friend who was really into it. Apparently, she was very curious about "why" I was the way I was. I thought it was pretty funny; that she was so adamant about the "why" part. So I gave her the data she needed and waited for her findings. A week later, she phoned, all excited, and asked me to come over for a glass of wine. Off I went to see what the stars had to say.

Turns out that little chart was quite the eye-opener. There were all kinds of things that led me to a better understanding of my personality traits and some of the more obvious leanings I had when dealing with the world. It was kinda cool. Still, I didn't go any further with it. I didn't buy books or do any research (as is my usual M.O.) because...well, frankly, I didn't really give a rip. I had that attitude of "I am who I am." and didn't give it much thought thereafter.

I won't say that I haven't been curious though. I think it's pretty wild that all kinds of "heads of state", etc., hire professional astrologers to tell them what's cookin'. I've always found that surprising. That, in itself, was what got me more curious. But, again, didn't do much about it.

But then something happened that made me remember my curiosity. It was a little spat I had with a friend. She got all upset with me because I'd actually taken action on a suggestion that she made. Turns out, she wasn't really wanting me to do what I did. And she got all pissed at me even though it had been her idea. I realized this as I listened to what she wasn't saying. She was pretty twisted and I could feel it. Even over the phone. I asked her what was wrong. She made all kinds of excuses but wouldn't tell me how she was really feeling. Finally I realized that there wasn't anything I could say or do to make her come clean. I knew what she was pissed about, but I also knew she wasn't going to cop to it. She was in one of her nasty moods where she wanted to be pissed; she wanted to fight and blame and not take responsibility. She simply wanted to feel the anger. And it wasn't really me at all. I knew all this instinctively; and after trying for a few long minutes, I finally told her that I saw no point in continuing the conversation. I told her that I could feel her anger and that I was pretty certain that she wasn't telling me the truth. I also told her that it was her choice to be pissed and stay that way if she wanted. And then I told her I loved her and hung up the phone.

A while later, after giving it much thought, I realized that there was really nothing I could do about how she felt. I realized that, in a much larger way, she really does look for things to be angry about. She wants to feel like crap so she can have a reason to get on-your-lips drunk. She has no desire to live the joy that she has only experienced in small doses throughout her life. It's her M.O. It's what makes her world go round.

Sad. But oh-so-true. I've known her for a very long time and it's been a pattern for as long as I've known her. We'll be sailing along, each of us making progress in our own growth cycles, and then...WHAMMO! She comes up with something to justify getting all nasty with me. Last time it happened was a few years back and I simply refused to dance. I told her it was her choice to make; I made mine and stopped calling. I just let her be and didn't make any attempts to patch things up, as it were. This made her furious. But, in the end, she came 'round and made all kinds of apologies for her behaviour. I am a person who believes wholeheartedly in forgiveness. So we "kissed and made up" and off we went onto the next chapter of our friendship.

Now, if it sounds like I'm trying to be the hero here, please know I am not. I have no desire to be the one in the "right". I don't really give a rip about who's right and who's wrong. What matters most to me is that we learn and grow and get better at being Who We Really Are. All the rest is just a bunch of hooey. We can go 'round blaming everybody and their grandmother for all the crap in our lives. OR we can step back and have a look in the mirror. Because the person staring back is the person responsible for all of it. Every single bit of the angst and anger and anything else that feels "less than" is created by "me". And the sooner we all get that part, the sooner we'll stop feeling that ickiness. I know. I've had my many epiphanies. And the one thing I know for sure is this:

I cannot change ANYONE. I cannot convince, cajole, brainwash, urge, shove, or man-handle anyone into a belief. The reason I know this is no one has ever been able to do it to me. There isn't a soul on the planet who can change my mind about anything I don't want to change. So...the point?

The only person I can change is ME. Sure, there are people who can inspire me to look at myself with different eyes and lend me a new perspective. But in the end, they can't make the changes. It must come from me. Knowing this makes moments like the one with my friend make a whole lot more sense (and it saves me from going cuckoo over something I have no control over). It takes the pressure off me to change her (or anyone else who happens to float into my world). I cannot. Nor do I have any desire. She must walk her path and live the life she's chosen, even if it's filled with stuff I consider icky. I am not her. She is not me. No one lives in my skin (and vice versa). Any attempt to change someone else will always result in the same outcome:

Utter failure.

So quit trying. Quit wasting your time and energy on changing anyone else. Use that same time/energy to work on YOU. In my experience, that is what will bring the most joy to YOUR world. But then...who the hell am I to tell YOU?

YOUR Story (cont'd)

So, onto Your story then, shall we?

{in the previous post...} we were exploring "undoing what's been done"...unlearning what's been taught...returning to Ultimate Knowing..."

So then...it seems the whole 'pretending' thing is a bit of a challenge for some 'grown-ups'. Mostly, I think, because we've been told that it's like telling a lie. And lies are bad, right? Not supposed to lie. Not supposed to 'make stuff up'. Not supposed to 'make believe'. Around about the time we entered grade school, our caretakers began to discourage this sort of behaviour. They told us things like, "you're too big for that now. You're a big boy/girl and you have to stop making things up. It isn't good to lie."

Uh-oh.

Now what? All this time (a whole 4 or 5 years!) we've been connected to all the magick of the entire Universe, seeing things the grownups can't see, hearing things they can't hear, listening with our hearts to All That Is...and suddenly it's "bad"???? I'm guessing that was pretty confusing for us. I'm also guessing that was when we began to forget all we carried with us into this adventure. Of course it was confusing. And also very, very sad.

But we didn't have much choice (or so we thought) at the time, did we? We were trying to please our caretakers. We were trying to assimilate this new world and do what we were 'supposed' to do in order to survive. And yes, at that point, it's about survival. Without them (our caretakers) we don't survive do we? They feed us, cloth us, keep us warm, provide love and nurturing. As Beings with the instinct to survive, we do what we have to do, yes?

Problem is, they don't know that they're taking away the very essence of Life itself. They don't know because they've forgotten too (remember?)

Now that we're the grownups, we've been so programmed to this so-called 'reality' that we don't remember about the pretending, or the magick, or the truth about who we really are. Which is why so many grownups are so miserable. Think about it: how many grownups have you ever met who were anywhere near as happy as a child playing? Personally, I've met a handful...at most. There are lots of grownups who act like they're happy, but if you're any kind of sensitive (intuitive), you can always feel the facade. It's not even about seeing it. It's about feeling it. They're unhappy and don't even know it. All they do know is that "one day" they're going to be happy again. When they get...(fill in the blank). More money. More time. Less working. A new car. A new house. A lover. The perfect job. Whatever. It's 'somewhere down the road' and when they get there, they'll be happy.

Uh-oh...again.

Happy isn't a place we get to. Happy is a state of Being. It starts right here, right now; it's an INSIDE JOB. It has nothing to do with external circumstances. And it isn't anything we have to put off til "some day". Right here. Right now.

But how do we get there?

Back to pretending. Let's just say that your current story is one that includes financial struggle, or physical malady, or a broken relationship. Whatever it is, you can't seem to NOT talk about it. You keep telling your story to anyone who'll listen. You just want it to go away... and you think that by 'venting' you're making it go away. Nope. Not how it works.

The more you tell that story, the more you LIVE that story. You're growing it, not erasing it. Because by mere speaking of it, you are giving it your attention, which in turn makes it 'real'. In other words, your thoughts, then turned to words, become the THINGS of your Life.

Did you get that?

Your thoughts become things.

You are manifesting every 'thing' in your life with the thoughts you carry most. So why do we do this? Why do we keep telling the story we don't like, and ignore the one we want?

Because, perhaps, we don't even realize that last part:

thoughts become things.

Chew on that for a while.