just in case there is...

If you happen to believe in a place called "heaven", it is likely you also have a fairly clear picture of what that place looks like. It could be some sunny, flowery field where the waterfalls are chocolate and the flowers smell like your mother's homemade cookies. Or maybe you imagine it to be palatial, where you get to live in the mansion of your dreams and you can eat lobster and caviar to your hearts' content without ever gaining an ounce. Perhaps it's simply an endless beach with crystal clear waters and bottomless margaritas. I've asked hundreds of people what heaven means to them, and not a single one of them repeated anyone else's version.

Such is the mystery of heaven. That is, if there is such a place.

Most of you are aware by now that I am not a follower of religious tenet. I don't believe in god as defined by religious cultures, regardless of sect. When people ask me if I believe in god, I always respond with, "first you'll have to define what god means to you". I do this because as varied as peoples' versions of heaven are, so are their definitions of what god is. It used to be a slippery slope, especially back when I was of a mind that I felt the need to defend myself. Major arguments would always ensue. Many "friends" were never to be seen again. Part of that was my doing because I was as vehement about my beliefs as they were about theirs. Nobody would budge. Feelings got hurt. Friendship over.

Many years  have passed since I was that confrontational Being. I no longer feel desire nor need to defend my beliefs, or judge anyone else for theirs. To each his own, I say. If believing in a god that will meet you at some pearly gates to welcome you home is what makes life more bearable for you, I see no reason whatsoever to hold it against you. As long as your beliefs don't infringe on my liberties we won't have a problem. End of story.

There are more reasons than fleas on a stray dog why I believe what I believe. Those reasons are neither relevant to this "conversation" nor anybody's business. I prefer to keep such things to myself or, in very special circumstances, between trusted friends. Mostly because I don't feel the need to talk about it. Also because it's a tired topic and I'd much prefer to talk of art and critters and music and mountains. It makes for a much more joyful Life, and these days that's pretty much all I care about.

Which leads us to the purpose of this missive:

I saw a photograph the other day on a post that was about who you'll meet in heaven. It was a lighthearted piece; it made me smile. Apparently, the woman who penned the piece was on the fence about "heaven". She was trying to figure it out by writing it out. I do it too. Probably a big reason why I write on this here blog. It's about reaching for clarity. Sometimes it works.

Anywhooooo....the moment I saw the photo, without reading a single word, the first thought that popped into my head was: "if there is such a place as heaven, this is what mine will look like." Just the thought of it made me giggle. My mind immediately snatched onto the thought and ran with it. All manner of lovely images flew though my head, making the scene so clear as to transport me to this heaven. That was a week ago. I haven't stopped thinking about it. It still makes me giggle. And I thought it might be a lovely way to begin my week. Just a little seed, tossed out to the winds, to see where it might plant itself.

There is no other purpose for this meandering, other than to toss it out to you, and, maybe, if I did my job well enough, inspire you to share your own thoughts.

Heaven or no?
What's it going to "look" like when you get there?
Who will be there to greet you at the gates?

{Go on. Click that comment button and share your thoughts. Please?!}

on courage...

One of the best books I ever read was "Another Roadside Attraction" by Tom Robbins (not to be confused with Harold, who wrote in an entirely different genre). Short of writing a book review here, I'll just give you the short'n'sweet: cool characters, great underlying messages, and perhaps the best quote I've ever copied. Kind of a mantra of mine. I actually wrote it out on parchment (in calligraphy!) and keep it tacked up on my wall so I can read it every day. For more than 25 years. Yep. I like it...a LOT.

So today I got to thinking about that quote (for the umpteen millionth time) and how it has affected me over the years. How it has been a light when there seemed to be only darkness. How it made me giggle at myself when I was being overly dramatic (oh yea. I can go there sometimes). How, in the face of adversity, that quote comes flyin' into my brain lickety split...and keeps me from straying too far from my balance. And I thought it might be fun to share it with you. (It seems like I have before but I can't seem to find it. So, if this is a "repeat" for you...oh well.)

...the character's name is Amanda. She is being held 'hostage' in her home by FBI agents who are looking for her husband. Her husband and his best friend have stolen the corpse of Jesus Christ from the catacombs of the Vatican. NOT something the government wants publicized. Like I said, cool characters. One of the agents has accused her husband of being a coward. He then proceeds to lecture her on the virtues of courage. Here is her response:

You risked your life, but what else have you ever risked? 
Have you ever risked disapproval? 
Have you ever risked a belief? 
There is nothing particularly courageous in risking one's life. 
So you lose it, you go to your hero's heaven and everything is milk and honey til the end of time, right? 
You get your reward and you suffer no earthly consequences. 
That's not courage. 
Real courage is risking something you have to keep on living with.
Real courage is risking something that might force you to rethink your thoughts
and suffer change
and stretch consciousness.
Real courage is risking one's cliches.

growing humor

What is it about people that makes them think you need to be saved? What is it that makes them so adamant about convincing you that what you believe is utter nonsense, or blasphemous, or absolutely leading you to the devil's doorstep. (Who IS this devil anyway?) How is it that these very same people will go on and on (and on and on) about their god...but will not remotely consider yours?

I've often wondered about such fanatics. I've known many. Seems like they have some kinda radar that brings them round to my world where they shove all kinds of books, tapes, movies, etc., etc., ad nauseam, at me with nary a hint of an ear for "no thanks." In fact, in recent months there have been people who actually stopped and pulled off to the side of the road as I walked with my dog, to give me their 'new' bibles, claiming that the King James version is 'antiquated'. (but "sin" is not. HUH?)

Now, don't get me wrong. I am a firm believer in the credo, "to each his own". I feel that everyone has the right to their beliefs and if it floats their boat, makes them a better person, and helps them expand the love, then good for them. What I don't believe is that they have a right to tell me how to think, believe or otherwise practice whatever it is I'm into. If I want to jump around naked and beat on a drum, who the hell are they to tell me it's wrong? If I want to dance with trees or sing to the birds or paint weird shit on my face, who are they to tell me I shouldn't do such things? Furthermore, the whole idea of fearing this god they speak of makes me wanna puke. Ya mean I'm supposed to be scared of this 'dude'? Say again?

When I was a kid I used to ask the nuns about this whole fear thing. They, of course, thought I was under the influence of the 'devil' and would immediately call my mother to advise her of my imminent path to hell. My mother would then sit me down and ask lots of questions about why I would ask the nuns such things. Lucky for me, she actually listened. She did not fear for my soul or demand I believe in her beliefs. She simply kept the lines of communication open well enough for her to monitor where I was 'going'. Her only concern: whether or not I knew the difference between 'good and bad'. She let me fly my own way and, I'm quite certain, said loads of prayers on my behalf. She did a fantastic job that way.

For years after I left the church, I studied many different philosophies, both religious and otherwise. I was simply awed by how so many people could buy into such beliefs, particularly those that preached fear. I just didn't get it. Still don't. If this god is so omniscient, omnipotent, and all-loving, why in the world would it need for us to fear it? Fear has nothing to do with love. Right? Well anyway, there seem to be a slew of folks who are, apparently, fearing for my soul (again). They're comin' out of the woodwork and doing their best to bash me over the head with their god-fearing tenets. Add to that the whole "the world is coming to an end. You'd better seek salvation now before it's too late." thang...and it's enough to make a girl go running through the streets (naked, of course) screaming like a lunatic.

Or maybe...

It's the All That Is telling me to grow my sense of humor.

I'm choosing humor on this one. After all, Life is ALL ABOUT CHOICES (grin)