yessssssssssssss

Oh... doncha just love it when the sky opens up and all those silly things you were all freaked about...just disappear in the ether? Yep. That's the good stuff. And every single time it happens, I'm reminded (again!) of that whole trust thang. I swear, you'd think by now I'd have it down. You'd think. But noooooooooo. I have to go through allllll these changes and sweat the small shit...which doesn't ever seem small when I'm sweating it...and then, when what happens happens...and it's all good and groovy...then I remember. JEEEEEEEEEZ.

I'm the one who's always saying "you gotta trust. you gotta believe. you gotta KNOW that everything is as it should be. It's all working perfectly. Trust. Trust. Trust." So, when I get myself into these little froths, it makes me crazier than usual. Because this is ME! I'm supposed to know better. I'm supposed to be going with the flow and all that jazz. Yea. Right. Liar liar pants on fire.

But the truth is, it's not that I'm a liar, it's that I FORGET. And I think I forget because those old tapes...the ones that have been playing in my head for so long...they just don't want to stop sometimes. They just keep rewinding and blaring their nasty noise. Try as I do, I can't seem to figure out how to erase those suckers. Not yet, anyway. But that doesn't mean I'm not still working on it. Cuz sooner or later, I WILL erase that crap...and it'll be gone forever.

For today, I'm thrilled to have made it through this last little escapade. I'm here. I'm smilin'. And life is AWESOME. Yep. Today...it's just as it should be.