All Else Is Clutter

I saw something today that got me to thinking about the term "reality". Thought now might be a terrific time to muse on the matter, in case someone needs a nudge.

It has become annoyingly apparent that there are people on this planet who would rather stare down at their phones than be part of the world around them. Just recently I did a little experiment (and you know how I love my experiments!). Whilst I was running errands, I started counting the number of people walking on the various streets I traveled. Of those, I counted how many were actually watching where they walked compared to those who were staring at their phones as they walked. I did this several times over the course of two weeks.

{As to why I would do such an experiment, the simple answer is: because I'm curious like that.}

The numbers were startling. More than EIGHTY PERCENT of the people I saw were completely unaware of their surroundings. They were so engrossed in their gadgets they were walking into signs and falling of curbs. It was shocking to me that none of them were hit by cars. I kid you NOT.

Then, today, I saw this comment from a darling woman who wondered aloud why it is that it's "socially acceptable" for people to wear a Virtual Reality headset or chase Pokeman all over town, yet unacceptable for someone to wave a magic wand and talk to faeries. She seemed a bit disturbed by this inequity; I felt her angst the moment I read the words.

It got me to thinking about all this "technology vs. spirituality" stuff. My immediate response to the woman was to offer some gentle words to remind her that "reality" is a personal thing.

Kinda like religion.

Ask anyone who believes in a god, and they'll give you a thousand reasons why theirs is the only god. They may even be able to quote their holy book, chapter and verse. But ask them why they believe it, and most couldn't tell you.

Flip side: ask anyone who swears by their technology and most will tell you, "it makes life easier or better or more efficient". As with religious zealots, they can give you reasons that may seem logical, but they couldn't tell you how or why it's improved their lives.

{Keep in mind, these are general observations. They do not apply to ALL people. There is a point to be made, hence the "general observations".}

And the point is this:

Comparisons will kill ya. Comparisons will cause great distress when one is unhappy with one's current circumstance. Comparisons fuel bitterness. Bitterness will keep you from flying.

That is, if you happen to believe in flying.

In the end, the only "reality" that matters is the one you create, the one you believe, the one you choose to live.

All else is just unnecessary clutter.

It also keeps you from your Joy.

{Please remember: you DO have a choice.}

it's all !S-D-R-A-W-K-C-A-B

{Confused? (the word is written backwards...get it?) Lemme tell ya...I had to really focus to do that without first writing it down. Good brain exercise. Try it. Quite a fun challenge.}

Moving on...

Let's just say that maybe things aren't exactly as you'd like them to be at the moment. Let's say it's about your cash flow. Or that person in your life. (or the lack thereof). Maybe it's about your job. (or the lack thereof). Or the way your body looks or how your kids are acting or that pain-in-the-butt neighbor who insists on cranking up the chainsaw at 7 a.m. every Sunday morning. Whatever "it" is, you think it's the reason you're not happy.

So then you say to yourself, "As soon as I get that handled, I'll be happy. Just gotta get that handled."

And you push and shove, push and shove, push and shove, trying to get it handled.

To no avail.

The more you push and shove, the bigger it gets. The more it pushes and shoves back. The more you try. The bigger it gets. Back and forth. On and on. Until you think you're never going to get to "happy".

But what if we've got it backwards? Bear with me now...

What if...we were to get happy first? What if, every time that annoying 'whatever' popped up, we were to say to ourselves, "STOP! JUST STOP! I'll think about that later. Right now I'm going to think about something that already makes me happy."

What if?

I'm posing this (for the millionth time) because I've been practicing a LOT lately. And I can assure you...it does take practice. It's not something we're trained to do. Mostly we've been trained to attack our "problems" head on and work it out. Did you see that word? WORK. Isn't work something that requires great effort? Isn't work something that most of us are averse to? Isn't work what we must do in order to get to play? How many times have you said, "THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!" The majority spend their whole lives waiting for Friday to get here. And Mondays get the bad rap. You know what I'm talking about, yes?

Practicing your mental train (of thought) takes a little time. But not as long as you might think. If you were to plant that seed of "STOP!" in your brain right now, and then listen for it...listen and feel your way to another train of thought...you'd be amazed at how much things change. I am NOT kidding. It goes something like this:

{Scenario #1}

The Bonehead that's always pissing you off walks into the room and begins his usual asinine behavior. Maybe he goes over to the microwave and puts his stinkin' sandwich directly on the platter (instead of being sanitary and considerate to the others, and placing it on a paper napkin or some such). He always puts cheese in those stinkin' sandwiches, which, of course, melts onto the platter. He never, ever cleans up after himself. Leaves the melted cheese on the platter and gets busy on his stinkin' sandwich. You've asked the Bonehead to stop doing this at least a hundred times. He continues to ignore you and everyone else, and puts his stinkin' sandwich on the platter. You can feel your blood pressure rising. You want to go over and slap the crap outta him. Instead, you allow yourself to seethe while the microwave heats his stinkin' sandwich. You're thinking you could just as easily heat that stinkin' sandwich with your hot thoughts right now. Seething hot thoughts.
It takes you an hour and a half to forget about it and get back to whatever you were doing. But next time you see the Bonehead, it all comes rushing back.

Round and round and round you go.

{Scenario #2}

Here comes the Bonehead. He's got another stinkin' sandwich; meatballs and mozzarella cheese. You just know that stinkin' sandwich is going to make the biggest mess ever. But instead of going all bonkers on yourself, you say "STOP!"...and then you turn your attention to the beautiful dinner you had with your best friend last night. Or the way your dog goes crazy when he sees you coming. Or how that really nice lady at the grocery store packed your groceries without crushing your bread. You remember that time you went to the coast for the weekend and spent days relaxing with nary a care in the world. You touch the necklace around your neck; the one you got from your mom when you graduated. You close your eyes for just a few seconds and take yourself elsewhere; you take yourself to some 'happy' place where there aren't any Boneheads.

Your breathing stays normal. Your blood pressure is right where you like it to be. Your body temperature remains at a steady 98.6. You have effectively taken yourself to another place and/or time where everything is as right as rain. Big, happy sighs ensue.

Feel the difference?

Whether it's about the Bonehead at work, the noisy neighbor, those size 7 jeans you want to get back into, or the person you'd like to have come into your life...FIRST you get happy. THEN all that other stuff comes flowing in like you were born with a magic wand and the power to make anything happen with the wave of a hand.

What if?

{REMEMBER: Joy is a CHOICE.}