Cricket LaStrada ~ An Angel Among Us

She was named Linda. But somewhere along the way, she became Cricket. As in Jiminy. As in Pinocchio's conscience. That's who she was. From very early in her life, she was the person everyone went to for guidance, and encouragement, and love. Lots and lots of love. The woman was fierce in her beliefs. And they were all grounded in heart. No one was ever more committed to making life better for those around her. She worked diligently and tenaciously for the Gay community, for the rights of AIDS victims, for teen-aged gay/lesbian suicide prevention, for abused women and children, for people with disabilities (which she called "gifts"), and for her family. ALL of her family.

Cricket and her wife adopted SEVEN children, four of whom came in one package. Sisters who were in foster care. They didn't want those girls to be split up. So...they adopted all of 'em. Their son, Thunder, was also in foster care. Then there was Ari, who came to them as a result of a familial situation that needed them. Daniel, their autistic son, had been with them from the beginning. In all, SEVEN little Beings who needed them. Can you even imagine????

For me, she was Big Sister, Protector, Coach, Sage. She hunted down the bullies who picked on me and put the fear of god in them. "You will NOT mess with my little sister." She made me feel safe, all through my school years, and beyond. It was in the sixth grade that she took the job of softball coach for the summer park league. She took her job quite seriously, and turned me into an MVP several years in a row. She taught me to "take ONE SECOND", plant my feet, and THROW. She taught me that my size didn't matter. That it was all about heart, and focus, and commitment. She was tireless. And she made every one of us believe that we COULD be better. Every day.

When I was thirteen, she taught me my first guitar chords. She LOVED music. She loved to sing and play and she made sure that all the kids had an instrument. From tambourines to tom-toms, everyone got to make  music. Her love of music was the driving force behind me, for more years than I can count. She called me a "star"...and she meant it. She never once doubted that I was "better than good enough". She  made me believe I could. Every day.

When I moved away, she was my constant supporter. She encouraged me to follow my dreams and ignore the naysayers. She was there for me, through every disaster, every trial, every misstep. She did not judge. She simply loved and tried to teach me how to love without condition. Her words, for all these years of my life, still echo. At precisely the right moment, they'll float up from my memory banks and guide me to my truth. She was, without question, an angel among us.

Cricket left the planet a few days ago. Her arduous journey has now come to an end. She left us with a giant hole in our world, a gap that will never be filled. But she also left us with her kindness, and her wisdom, and her enormous capacity to love. She did the best she knew how, and she did it with every fiber of her Being. She may have left the Planet, but she is not gone. She is here, all around me, whispering and giggling and urging me on.

She was my first hero.

She is my Sister.

Ti amo, Sorella Mia.

Volare con gli angeli.
{fly with the angels}

When Death Is A Gift

We all know...that death is a part of life. Nobody likes it. Everybody thinks they understand it. But mostly, we do our best to avoid the subject altogether. We don't like to think about it. Or talk about it. Or face it when it comes time to face it. But, we all know...that death is a part of life.

Now, given that this blog is about Joy, about choosing Joy, one might wonder why in the world I'd be talking about death. Please...bear with me. Although there seems not to be anything joyful about it, there are times when death is welcome. Times when losing someone, so to speak, brings relief. To be sure, there is also sorrow. But when someone you love is in such deep and unyielding pain, suffering every moment of every day, for months on end, sometimes we pray for them to go. Sometimes we know that even though it means not having them on the Planet, we'd rather be without them than watch them suffer. When death comes, in times like this, we'll often feel, not only relief, but joy. Joy for this loved one to have cast aside the burdens of the body and soar. Whether one believes in a "heaven" or not, still there must be some other realm where we live on. Because if we are what scientists claim, if we are "energy", we know, too, that energy never dies. Energy may take different forms. It may be diffused or scattered or moved. But energy does not die. Ever.

With this in mind, no matter what a person's religious or spiritual beliefs, if one has any semblance of intuition, then one would know, somewhere deep in themselves, that death is really not. It is simply a transition. A transcendence. A variation of what we call "life". And knowing this somehow makes the whole death process just a little more bearable. Even when we know that there will be no more touching of hands or hugging of necks or kissing of cheeks, there is no thing that can stop the love that lives on. Because love, like energy, does not "die". Instead, it seems to deepen. To become even more treasured. And, if we're really mindful, death can also urge us to be more loving and appreciative of those who are still here, on this magnificent Planet, for us to touch. And hug. And kiss. Death, in some ways, is as much a gift as Life.

But still...it hurts.

So for today, I pray that those of you who have or are right now dealing with the passing of someone you love dearly, I pray you will remember that even amidst the pain of that loss, there is a gift. Your journey, being without their physical presence, does not need to destroy you. Walk that path, trusting that you will soon reach a peaceful spot on your own chosen path, where you will, once again, feel their presence. You will hear their voice and feel the love even more deeply than, perhaps, you did before they left. When you reach that place, sit yourself down and allow your spirit to luxuriate in the love that never dies.

Then....do your happy dance.