happy holidays and all that jazz!

Wishing you all a MARVELISHEOUS CHRISTMAS...and all the other holidays you may be celebrating. Be safe, eat well, and spread the love! Til next time....

My love and hugs to YOU!

Camille Olivia

stand in your truth ~

When you choose to stand in your truth, grounded in who you are and not allowing yourself to be taunted into the facades that others wish for you to wear, there is no need ever again for apology or guilt or even remorse. Your truth is a sort of golden aura of protection from all the worlds' barrage.

Waxing poetic?

Yes indeed.

It is the little miracles that occur, day by day, moment by moment, that show me just how true this truth is. To see, with acute clarity, just how far a distance I've traveled...and know that in the wake of that journey there is a growing stream of love. Uncanny. Beautiful. Incredibly empowering. And...loads of fun.

A recent 'experience' showed me just how much I am standing in my truth. As I listened to a friend of mine go from frustrated to full-blown pissed off, AT ME...I sat and felt what was going on, rather than listening to her words grow hateful. On her behalf, I will say that this does happen when she has one too many glasses of vino. Not judging. Just saying. It happens. And I can always feel it as it does. I can feel her slip away...into that dark place where she thinks she's safe. I feel for her that way. I've been there too. But anyway...there we were, having this light-hearted conversation when all of a sudden everything shifted. She got really pissed and started attacking me. She said some pretty ugly things...all of which I knew weren't really directed at me, but yes, I was the one who she was dishin' it to. Each time she demanded a response, I sanswered her gently and then asked another question. Finally, I suppose she realized she was getting nowhere with her vicious attack...and I asked, "what's wrong? What is it that's bothering you?" She said that she was just tired. That she was exhausted from this emotional roller coaster she'd been on. So I gently said, "well then, why don't you get some rest. We'll chat tomorrow." She hung up the phone before I could even say goodnight.

I sat there for a minute, with this feeling of complete awe. I had not gotten upset. Nor defensive. Nor retaliatory. I listened, I asked, I put my heart in that calm place of sheer love...and I waited.

This from the Queen of Warriors. This from the gal who used to stand on any table top she could find an swing her two-by-four just because. This from a woman who has made it her mission in life to prove herself right.

WOW.

WOW.

WOW.

Yep. It's all about standing in your truth. Because when you do...there is no need to be 'right'. There is only your truth.

And that, my friend, is a splendid way to live.

a very happy solstice ~

Today is one of my favorite days of the year. I love the Winter Solstice and all the celebrations that go with it. The darkest day...always so full of light, for me. Candles and songs and wonderful visions of the Sun God being born anew. Images of Avalon and priestesses, dancing under the moon with a roaring fire blazing in the circle. Drums and flutes and magick abound.

So on this Winter Solstice, I wish you all the love you deserve.
I wish you light and magick.
Most of all...
I wish you Love.

Honor yourself!
{or else, who will???}

jolly or humbug?

Take a deeeeep breath. Go on. You can do it.

Okay. Now then...

I thought today would be a good day to offer up some seeds for the coming weeks...as Christmas and New Year's Day loom ever closer. Seems to me, no matter how much I speak on this, or offer up little bits of laughter, there are still those who're completely overwhelmed, stressed out, burned out, freakin' out, and flat-out in a tizzy. But I'm going to offer it up again...just cuz.

Maybe it's because I'm don't get into the frenzy of shopping {there IS another way to approach this!} Or maybe it's because I've finally figured out that the 'holiday season' is about gatherings with loved ones, not about gifts and money and all that jazz. Or...maybe...it's just because I happen to find the whole season a supergroovyblast. I'm a kid...I don't deny this. So when Thanksgiving rolls around, I get as excited as I did when I was 5. I look out the window when it's raining and I imagine it's snowing. I can see Santa flyin' around in the sky and the reindeer towing the sleigh, I can hear the jingle bells jinglin', and the HO!HO!HO! and I can see all the goodies on the kitchen table on Christmas morning, the result of my mom's weeks of baking and hiding the cookies so there'd be some left on Christmas morning.

To this very day, I really do get that excited about the holidays. Even when I go into town whether it's to shop for groceries or gifts, I take the time to get into 'mode', knowing that there's going to be more traffic, more people in the stores, more Cranky Pants doing their own versions of the Grinch. I put on my Santa hat or my antlers (they light up!) and my jingle bells (oh yea. I have some of those...and they work wonderfully on whatever boots I happen to put on), I wear little Christmas light earrings (these light up too) and I set out with a jolly attitude and a mindset that I will NOT be in a hurry. Take my time, enjoy the lights and the songs and the merry people I ALWAYS run into (funny thing about this: when I set that intention, I rarely run into those cranky pants types...go figure) And inevitably, the whole thing turns into a fun adventure (as opposed to a holiday nightmare).

In short, it's about ATTITUDE. It's about making up your mind to have fun with all of it. It's about letting go of all the rushing and shoving and resisting. You already KNOW what you're going to face. Traffic. Hordes of shoppers. Long lines. And maybe a Scrooge or two. So, rather than dreading it, make up your mind to find the joy. LOOK for it! Sing a song. Wear your Santa hat or some antlers. Put your engine in low gear and just cruise. It's so much more fun...and so much less stressful...and when you get back home, you're not going to be all frazzled and grumpy. Instead, you're likely to be enjoying the season for what it is: a time to spread joy and lift yourself up and gather 'round the fire with those people who make you smile. As for the rest? If they want to be miserable, that's their choice. Ain't your job to talk 'em out of it. Ain't your job to try to change them. As ol' Mr. Lincoln said:

"every man has the right to be as happy or as miserable as he chooses".

So...what's YOUR choice?

your words are your wand ~

One of the easiest things to do is 'look back'. The adage "hindsight is 20/20" didn't stick around for nothing. It's true. We can always see what we've done after the fact. And, if you're like most folks, that hindsight will often trigger regret.

If only I had....

But here's the thing ~ as with all other choices, choosing to see what's already been in a grateful light, as opposed to a rueful one, is paramount to your continued growth. If you're looking back and feeling as if you 'could have' something better, you're missing the whole point of the experience. Because, near as I can tell, there are no mistakes. No bad choices. No screw-ups. I mean, think about that for a second. When you make choices, do you make them KNOWING they're 'bad' or 'wrong' or 'screwed up'??? Of course you don't! You make them based on where you are at that moment and what you THINK is the best choice for you 'right now'.

Well, mostly anyway.

Beyond all that, though, there's something else that really messes with your forward movement. It's that whole thing about re-telling the story, over and over and over again, as if you have some masochistic need to keep living it. And every time you re-tell that story, that's precisely what you're doing:

RE-LIVING IT.

Why? Why do we feel the need to do this? Why must we share that not-so-happy experience with anyone? Why not just let it be done with, see it for what it had to teach us, and move on? Is it because we have an innate desire to elicit sympathy? Or be coddled? Or have everyone share in our misery?

We cannot undo the past. We cannot 'go back'. We cannot change what has been. All we CAN do is keep moving...onward, onward...and cut loose all that icky baggage as we go. Not that there is nothing to be learned from the things we've done. But see that for what it is...and LET IT GO.

This may be a round-about way to get to my point (isn't it always?...JEEZ!) but here it is:

The words you choose have a direct affect on the life you live.

Not just sometimes.

ALWAYS.

If you keep saying stuff like, "this is really hard" or "I'm so broke I can't even pay attention" or "I just wish I hadn't...." or "I don't know what to do", then you are most certainly RIGHT. About all of it. I know from having said/done the very same thing. I lived that way for most of my life.

All those "if only I had...."s.

ICK. ICK. ICK.

The alternative?

Tell the story you WANT to live. Tell the story of the Life you imagine. Tell the story of your Joy. It does NOT matter if that story isn't yet 'true' or 'real'. Because, if you really, really, REALLY want to live it, it IS true. I don't give a yahooo what anybody says. It's your world and you can create it any way you WANT.

How?

By choosing your words...the words you think as well as speak. The ones that create the images you want most to see both in your head and with your puny human eyes. By being absolutely relentless in your vision of that world. By having the tenacity of a Pit Bull and the moxie of a colt. By refusing to tell any story that's "less than". Choose those words that grow conviction, and conjure images, and make you feel that tickle in your belly that tells you....

YES I CAN...anything I want.

Your words are your wand. How you choose to use them....

is entirely up to you.

grumpy lumps?

Don't you find it odd how so many people turn into BigFatGrumps around this time of year? How is that again? Yea. It's weird to me too. I don't get it. I think it's pretty sad that people go into Grump mode when 'tis the season to be jolly, ya know?

Case in point: the person I share a house comes from a Jewish family. Now, I don't say this because I happen to give a rip about anyone's choice of 'faith'. Frankly, I couldn't care less. It just so happens that this particular person claims NOT to be (Jewish), yet, at every turn he manages to incorporate those teachings into his excuses for his perspective on what the rest of the world honors. In short, he's quite the biggot...on every level. So, how he perceives the holidays is both cynical and critical. Very short-sighted and utterly tunnel-visioned.

Very sad.

Anyway, this will be our second Christmas-time (sharing a house). Last year, right before Thanksgiving, he started his incessant whining. When this guy gets on a 'thing', he obsesses like nobody's business, so when I say "incessant", I'm NOT kidding. Dude can make the best soap opera actors look like amateurs.

Lucky for me, I'm good at tuning out. In one ear, out the other is pretty easy for me. Especially when the 'noise' is in said 'whiney' tone. ICK. So...

This year, when the whining began, I did what I usually do: I just tuned him out. No replies, no acknowledgment, no 'suggestion for perspective'. Just ignored him. And then, the weirdest thing happened.

He stopped. Guess he figured out that his whining was falling on deaf ears. No audience, no reason to continue. After a bit, he finally asked me about my 'silence'. I didn't respond right away. Gave it a good bit of thought before I did. And then I told him that I figured it was his choice to be all grumpy if he wanted to. His choice to view the holidays as "one big capitalistic media frenzy", as he calls it. His choice to be a grump from November til January. You wanna live in that space? Go right ahead. Enjoy your misery. Me? I'm gonna embrace what it really means...and share the joy.

Not surprisingly, his first response to this was "you live in LaLa Land. You're so naive."

LAUGHING MY ASS OFF. Yea. You're right. I do live in LaLa Land. It's much more fun here. So, who's wishing 2 months of their life away? Me or you?

Here's what I believe (as if you asked):

I believe that this time of year is the perfect opportunity to return to joy...and stay there. I believe that you can buy into the shopping frenzy OR you can just embrace the renewal of Life's cycle. I'm not talking about "the birth of Jesus Christ". (Actually, ol' JC wasn't born in December, he was born sometime in the Spring. No one knows the exact date, but it's been proven over and over: he was NOT born in December. That's a whole 'nother story....) What I AM talking about is the seasonal celebration of the Winter Solstice. The ORIGINAL reason for the season. Not the Christian version, or the 'religious' anything. Tis the season for celebrating the replenishment our Planet. Earth is resting. She's restoring energy so She may give new Life again. When the Winter has passed, She will once again sprout new buds, new life, new offerings for us to sustain ourselves and continue on.

This is what 'the season' is for me. There is no religious attachment, nor commercial obligation. The gift-giving is just an added treat, should I choose to participate (which I do...cuz it's FUN!). But I don't limit such gift-giving to this one time of year. I'm one of those "spirit of the season, all year 'round" kinda gals. I don't even take my tree down (it's artificial, and looks like a tree right out of Yosemite...VERY cool.) I just think it's ridiculous to limit ourselves to one day of the year. Why not hold those feelings every day? Works for me...

So then...the point I was trying to make (and got all side-tracked. OOPS.) was this:
as with all things in Life, YOU have the choice. You can choose to enJOY or you can choose to GRUMP. It is, after all, YOUR life.

So, how's that workin' for ya?

in the vision comes your dream ~

there is no such thing as
impossible.
nor is there any
never.
or can't.
there is only what you
believe
and what you know in your heart
is your truth.
i am living proof of this.
my life is proof that all things
are possible.
and in the moments when i hear the words
"...it never happens"
"it will never happen"
"it's impossible"
i am instantly alerted
to the possibilities
that are about to
show themselves.
this is my truth.
this is what i
KNOW.
and for you...
if you don't yet know this
you shall.
soon.
very soon.
first...
you gotta
believe.